Oh, hello Jochum Jocks. Jochum Meatheads. Jochum Bros. Just kidding, I could never stereotype ya’ll like that right off the bat. I’m simply preparing you for what is to come, because when you read this, you might feel slightly attacked. I want to make it very clear that this blog post is not directed at all men, and honestly—more than likely—is not directed at Jochum readers. *winky face* Any brownie points yet?
The ‘Top 10 Things Guys Need to Stop Doing in the Gym’ is directed at the innumerable men I have carefully (not creepily) observed throughout my career as an active gym goer. These males were mostly observed in big box gyms like Lifetime and LA Fitness, but this is not to say these behaviors are completely absent from fitness boutiques. Truth be told, I feel like I really have seen it all.
In addition, I received feedback from about 1,000 participants via instagram (shameless plug for my instagram...sauce me a follow at @urfitnesswitness). Below, you’ll find the 10 most common responses I received from my brutally honest instagram followers. I asked, “What do men need to stop doing in the gym?” Let’s make it clear—I had responses from both men and women alike. So even if you think you’re pleasing everyone at the gym, you may as well take a peek at the list below to make sure you’re following the social expectations of your peers, and ensure you’re not acting like a privileged, overconfident jackass. HA. So… HERE WE GO!
1 OBNOXIOUS GRUNTING
A man has picked up something heavy and he wants everyone in the gym to know about it. Cue the “obnoxious grunt.” I want to make this as clear as possible—multiple loud and drawn out grunts are not necessary. It’s understandable that when someone exerts energy an audible puff of air may slip out of someone’s mouth during the peak of his or her lift, but if you’re grunting louder than the ambient noise around you, you’re probably grunting too loud. Like dude... you’re hammer curling 25 lbs, chill out. #STOP OBNOXIOUS GRUNTING 2020.
Most women view these obnoxious grunts as a male desperately trying to prove his
dominance and masculinity. All I’m saying is that if you need to feed your masculine ego that badly, I will assume you’re lacking in “other areas.” We all know your secret. Am I exaggerating? Probably. But if it stops men from grunting, I say it’s factual. Grunting = small willy. LOL WOW I AM SORRY I STARTED OUT WITH THIS ONE.