No Body Fucking Cares About Your Biceps
Same Goes for your trophies, awards and job.
This is one of my biggest talking points in all my public speeches I give. It always gets snickers from some meathead in the back and it always puts a questioning look on others face. Why is a strength coach telling me he doesn’t care about any of this? Isn’t this his job?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a complacent "you're good the way you are and shouldn't strive to be greater" type guy. I have a side to me that I can turn on to get shit done, that allows me to be uber competitive, that allows me to do things others wouldn’t. Ask people I’ve competed against before; I have a not nice side. It’s a side that has allowed me to succeed before in a materialist world. It’s a side that if I allow, can take over and makes me obsess over something. It’s something I think is a very powerful tool for me if I use it right. I also understand that you want respect from others, you want to impress that cute girl, you want to feel good in the moment and these things will do that for you. But I also know the pitfall to them and where it can lead you to. The valleys it can trap you in and that fleeting sense of satisfaction you feel and then the emptiness you feel when you look back on what it took for you to get there. Nobody fucking cares about your biceps, your trophies or your awards. They care about how you treat others and how you are living your life.
I’ve learned this lesson the hard way and I never want an athlete I coach to have to learn this the way I did. So, my goal is to cover a couple things that keeps you away from this.
1) Have a Why
2) Have a Rock
3) Have a Lightbringer
Have a Why
Why do you do what you do? If its for some of the reasons mentioned above, wanting to impress or gain respect from others or you’re expecting it to fill some sort of fulfillment within you, I have some tough news for you, its not going to work. It’ll make you feel good for a bit; you’ll smile, you’ll think you’re on top of the world, but the flood is coming, it always does. So, develop a reason for doing what you are doing, that is greater than yourself. Something that allows you to use your talents and success to accomplish something so much greater than a award you get and if you’re on the path I bet that award still comes and I bet it’ll mean a whole lot more to you that you were living out your why than that piece of paper did. What’s the best way to find a why? What means the most in the world to you and how could you make that better? Is it your family or your community? Maybe you play or work to better them and pay back everything they have put into you. Find a why that is greater than yourself.
Podcast Interview Describing My Wake Up Call Towards This
Have a Rock
The flood is coming, it always does. The Mountains always have valleys coming next. Who is going to be there when you must face these things? Who is going to be there to show you that maybe you aren’t being who you are supposed to be? Who is going to be there to ground you? The answer is no one if you are doing what you are doing for the wrong reasons and that’s not a good thing. You need a rock in your life, a person, a religion, something that is unwavering with unconditional love and direction. If you don’t have or you don’t listen to yours, you’ll quickly get caught up into the trap of awards and trophies without realizing where you are going or why you are doing it. This rock will allow you to keep your why intact. Not allowing you to sacrifice who you could be and the goodness within for the fleeting sense of satisfaction. This rock will keep you grounded in the fact that these things don’t matter and that you need to be bringing others with you on your path. Find a Rock and listen to it.
Have a Light Bringer
While the rock is there to keep you grounded in who you are, the light bringer is there to show you who you could become. Jordan Peterson says, “Compare yourself to who you were yesterday not to who someone else is today” and I think that’s an awesome quote. This can be a coach, an idol or a religion (It’s a reason I think religion can be such a powerful tool for athletes it can be a rock and a light bringer all in one. It’s something I want to research more into with successful athletes and people and why there seems to be a correlation there.) This light bringer only helps you however, if you listen to it. If you allow your ego to come in the way of the message, they are trying to give you, you’re going to struggle and feel that lack of fulfillment. When someone tells you, you can improve on something, you can become a better version of yourself, take that as an opportunity to do it, not as an insult. If you bring good people into your life, they are going to want to help you, so allow them to. Find a light bringer to show you who you could become.
Hopefully this quick Blog gave you some sort of insight into why I believe this to be the write way to go about things, but I can dive way more in depth on any of these topics if you want me to! Let me know email me Jochumstrength.com I love discussing these things and your questions and conversations spark all my ideas. Keep Chopping Wood.